dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
