What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
