He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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