There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize