I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
