obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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