I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize