I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
