so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
