She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
