There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
