I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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