If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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