Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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