dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
