I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
My breasts were aching with rage.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
