Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
