Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize