i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize