No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Randomize