Already got asked if we're dating
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
