can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
