Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
