Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Randomize