Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
