If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
