you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize