Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
