i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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