there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
