At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
