shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
