But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Randomize
