he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
