I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
