Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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