If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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