i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
