its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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