Where did you get a picture of my penis
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
