I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
We got so high we made milksteak
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
