she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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