You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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