my text book just quoted the cookie monster
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
