I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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