Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
