Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Randomize
