Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
