Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
