Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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