dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
How naked do you want me to be?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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