he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
