this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
